Attempt suicide…go to jail. Wait, What?

The goal of this blog is to begin to unravel the stigma associated with suicide and it’s underlying causes.  I believe that it is this stigma that keeps people (especially younger people) from seeking treatment for depression.  No young person wants to be seen as “different”, so their affliction goes untreated and may result in suicide.  Likewise, it keeps survivor families from talking about their grief, not wanting others to judge them and perhaps blame them for their loved ones death. So, their grief is prolonged, or never dealt with, which may lead to further ruined lives

So, no one talks and  suicides continue.  This has to change.

In the news today there was an article that illustrates how misguided our society is in regards to suicide.  The US military is experiencing a huge increase in suicides within their ranks. Just this past year, suicides within the military account for 20% of service members deaths.  And once they are out of the military, the view isn’t much better.  From the beginning of 2008 to the end of 2009, nearly 4000 veterans enrolled for VA care died of suicide.

But what is amazing is how the military is approaching suicide and attempted suicide of their members.

Active-duty members of the military who succeed in killing themselves are treated as having died honorably. Active-duty members who try and fail may be prosecuted under the Uniform Code of Military Justice if the suicide attempt is deemed conduct that causes “prejudice to good order and discipline” or has a “tendency to bring the service into disrepute.”

So let me see if I understand this right…if a soldier dies of suicide, there is no dishonor, but if they are unsuccessful, they are subject to prosecution.  I guess they are at least kicked out of the service with a dishonorable discharge, and at most they go to prison.  This is outrageous and will result in disastrous unintended consequences. I see one of two things happening:

• There will be an increase in the number of people dieing of suicide as a result of a decrease in the number of failed attempts.  Many will choose a more violent means of death as to not subject themselves to punishment for failing in their attempt.  The suicide rate will increase.
• Fewer members will seek help in that they see the wall of non-concern in front of them.  Why should they seek the help they need when their superiors and the military courts are set to get rid of them.  Without effective treatment, the suicide rate will increase.

Hey here is an idea…how about we talk about suicide and depression in a constructive manner so our soldiers are given the help they need to deal with the problems they are facing.  Many of the issues they are facing are a result of actions we have asked them to take in service to our country.  Giving them the help they need is the least we can do for the sacrifices they have made, and continue to make.

Ok…getting off my soapbox now…

Confronting this type of nonsense is imperative so that lives can be changed…and perhaps a few can be saved.

Why don’t we talk about suicide?

Everything you read mentions there is a stigma about suicide and it’s root causes.  a stigma is defined as a mark of disgrace.  Now I am not professing that a suicide is something to be proud of, by any means, but why a disgrace?

I think one reason it is thought of as disgraceful is because of how we talk about suicide…when we talk about suicide. When someone dies from their own hand, it is commonly known by “committing suicide”. but why the word “committing”?  if someone dies of cancer, they didn’t “commit cancer”. Instead, they died of cancer.  Similarly, we should say that a person “died of suicide”.  Why not?  The only other thing I can think of that someone commits, other than suicide is a felony.  And perhaps that is why we talk that way.  Committing a suicide has a shameful sound to it.  Again, not trying to glamorize suicide, by any means, but might it be a barrier to talking about it?

Secondly, I think that families have a hard time talking about the the leading causes of suicide because they don’t want to be thought of in “that way”  In my case, I didn’t talk about Mike’s issues because I felt that he would get better, and this would be behind us some day.  I didn’t want folks to think about him in that way and carry that reputation…I was wrong.  Who could I have helped by talking about the problems, and who could have helped my family?

I think it is time to begin talking about suicide and depression and addiction…and all these other hard subjects that we would rather ignore.  because ignoring it isn’t making it go away.

Lets try something different, shall we?

Here is a movie we put together that I think brings home the point.